Expert Advice: Encouraging or Discouraging? November 14, 2010
Posted by sonyahaskins in Devotional Thoughts, Homeschool.Tags: advice, encouragement, family, home education, Homeschool, homeschooling, Parenting
add a comment
This is a very short excerpt from my newest book, Homeschooling for the Rest of Us (Bethany House, 2010). This topic was on my mind today and I thought perhaps it would bring encouragement to some of you. Sonya 
side of all of this. At times moms comment to me, “I would never be able to take care of the household, teach my children, cook, do all the other things I need to do, and write books like you do!” The fact is I can’t do all these things either. When I’m finishing a big project like a book, other things have to wait—including a clean house and fresh-cooked meals.
If you’re still feeling pressure because experts or others tell you to “do it this way” or “if you’d only follow my plan, your life will be perfect, your children will obey, and they will love learning” or any other “just do it my way” kinds of statements, my advice is simple: Find different experts!
An attitude of gratitude January 15, 2009
Posted by sonyahaskins in Devotional Thoughts, homeschool life, Parenting.add a comment
I heard something today that really made me think.
A man was talking about his life and growing up in the Great Depression. During that time, when he was 12 years old, his father died, leaving his mother with 7 young children, no money, and no income.
This man said that he remembered his mom, like a mother hen, huddling all the children around the casket at his father’s funeral. She looked down at his father, with the children there in front of her and said, “Look at what you’ve left me with…”
And I fully expected her to say something like, “all these children, no money, and what am I supposed to do?”
But instead, she said, “Look at what you’ve left me with” and she looked at the children, “something that is worth more than all the gold in the world. THANK YOU.”
Wow.
I am so thankful for this wonderful example of gratitude, faith, and devotion. I hope it encourages you today as it has me.
Sonya Haskins
mom, author, homeschool advocate
Seeking Perfection… January 12, 2009
Posted by sonyahaskins in Devotional Thoughts, Homeschool, homeschool life, Parenting.add a comment
Chris took the children to church this morning while I rested. Even though I pray all the time, study my Bible regularly, and truly worship God in my heart without church, I still don’t like to miss church. My pastor gives the best sermons in the world and it’s nice to visit with fellow believers. When I can’t go, Chris and the children tell me about the sermon when they come home. That’s good, but it’s not the same as hearing it myself.
Sometimes our pastor plays a short video clip of missionaries or something pertaining to the sermon. This morning the children and Chris came home telling me how powerful the video was that he used today. You can view it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yX_7j32zgNw It’s amazing! The video is a sermon entitled “That’s My King!” by S.M. Lockridge. Take six minutes of your day to watch it. It will thoroughly inspire you!
As Chris and the children were telling me about the service, Chris also mentioned that a new family visited today. He thought I might know them because they homeschool and have ten children. I immediately thought I knew who he was talking about and I said, “Were they perfect? Sitting in the pews quietly? Dressed neatly? Etc.?”
Chris thought for a moment and said, “Yes, they were.”
He gave me a kind of funny look and Sarah said, “Mommy doesn’t like perfect,” as if that would explain everything.
Although I denied this fact, I couldn’t help but think of my wonderful editor. We’ve had many discussions on this topic and I immediately thought, “Gee, it’s pretty bad that my editor would probably agree with my 12-year-old daughter on this topic!”
Instead of saying that, I said out loud, “Oh yeah, I know who they are. That’s the ___ family. They are as sweet as can be.”
“You don’t mind that they are perfect,” he asked, imitating the way I had said the word.
“Oh, no,” I said, “Of course not, but they are pretty perfect.”
I told him how the mom had shared at a mom’s meeting one time how a new homeschooling mom had asked how to reduce her stress. This mother replied that she didn’t have any stress because they followed a strict schedule so everyone knows what needs to be done when. They get up at 6:00 and all the children are responsible for getting dressed and doing morning chores by 7:00, when they have to be at the breakfast table. They eat a full breakfast every morning with dad before he leaves for work so that he can do Bible study with them. Then they clean up the dishes and start school at 8:00. They do school for four hours and then break for lunch at noon. The children rotate lunch and dinner duty so that mom doesn’t have to cook the meals. After lunch, they have quiet time, then play time before dinner. After dinner, which is served at 6:00, they have family time for a couple of hours and then the children are in bed at 8:00.
I remember watching the reaction of the new homeschool mom as this veteran homeschooler was sharing this information. The new homeschooler looked as if her eyes would pop out of her head.
To ease her mind and help her get her eyes back into their sockets, I said, “Actually, I think that might drive the average person insane!
“You don’t have to do it that way,” I stated.
The veteran homeschool mom is one of the sweetest people I know and I was quick to acknowledge to the group present that if they were able to manage their household so efficiently and maintain a schedule so expertly, then by all means they should do so. That is a wonderful way to train your children about scheduling, discipline, responsibility, commitment, etc. However, I also think that it’s just not possible for some families to maintain such structure and if they try to do it and can’t, it’s a greater source of frustration and stress than they had to begin with.
I really am not against “perfection,” but rather the idea that we can attain it. Perfection is attained through the only one who is perfect – the Lord Jesus Christ. Also, it’s very easy to look at someone else’s situation and desire to be like them, but God gives each of us our own unique abilities and challenges. Instead of worrying about or comparing yourself to others, seek the Lord’s will for your life – and your homeschool.
Rather than seeking perfection or an idea of perfection that you’ve developed by observing someone else or creating an ideal world in your mind, seek the Lord. Seek God. Know God. Love God. Obey God. If you do this, the rest will follow and it doesn’t much matter if you follow a strict or a flexible schedule so long as you have the Light to guide you.
Sonya
“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” Matthew 6:33
The Weighted Coin September 26, 2008
Posted by sonyahaskins in Devotional Thoughts, Homeschool.Tags: faith, Homeschool, Jesus, math, sin
add a comment
Have you ever done the math experiment where you toss a coin in the air 100 or 200 times and see how many times it lands on each side? No matter how many times you do the experiment, it will work out to about 50% each time. Now it might be 48% or even 55%, but it’s always very close to 50%.
There are mathematical absolutes throughout our amazing world. One of those absolutes is that if all other factors are equal in regards to two choices, then the statistical probability that one will be chosen is about 50%. But what if you have a weighted coin?
In other words, if all things aren’t equal, then one choice is going to be chosen more than the other. For example, let’s say you have two basketball teams with identical talent, but a player on one of the teams is being paid to “throw” the game. It is highly likely that this team is going to lose. Now the other players may be able to make up for this difference sometimes, but for the most part they are going to lose more games when one of the players is working for the opponent.
Have you wondered why abortion, homosexuality, lying, cheating, adultery, drunkenness, laziness, disrespect, and other sinful behaviors are becoming increasingly predominant in our society?
If all other things were equal, don’t you think we would see an even distribution of good and evil in the world?
Are you willing to consider the possibility that there is a weighted coin?
“… after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.” James 1:15
When you look at it that way, you have to admit that there is a supernatural force influencing people in our world today. Humans are becoming increasingly lustful, sinful, worldly, etc. Satan is definitely doing his best to “throw the game.”
Humans are sinful by nature and thus we are already destined to “lose,” but there is a weighted coin. Jesus Christ. With faith in God’s only son, the coin toss has already been won.
Sonya
“For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast.” Ephesians 2:8-9
